Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Sex : More than a Competition!

A good number of women feel that men should know how to make love to a lady and most times, they get disappointed. A good number of men expect their wives to be super hot in bed, but she turns out to be frigid, cold, and simply managing sexual intimacy. Out of displeasure, many have introduced a lot of deception and manipulation to sex making it more like competition for the men and a boring duty for women.

Men watch pornography and then treat their wives like animals while thrusting. Wives, on the other hand, are so busy with their children, career, church, and friends that they no longer have enough time to enjoy genuine intimacy with their husbands. They are no longer making efforts to satisfy him (though many cannot be satisfied as they want the woman to become their sex slave).

Sex is not a competition between husband and wife. God did not design sex for the selfish fulfillment of one over another.

Dear husband, it is wrong to just grab your wife and begin to dig into her; wondering how you expect her to enjoy such slavery. When you do that, you are sending emotional pain, torture, and fear into her body. All she gets is that feeling of sharp objects penetrating her. Don't be deceived by her acting and dying in silence just to please you, she is not enjoying it!

Please do not invent pornography into your marriage and never your treat your wife like she is a porn star because you would be pushing her to hate sex and sexual intimacy.

Foreplay is a must. I know you are so much in a hurry to let it all out. But, you have to slow down. You should give, at least fifteen minutes to foreplay if you want your wife to have that memorable time. Kiss her passionately. Use your tongue to arouse her by running it all over her body. There are women who hate the feel of saliva on their body; if she is one of such women, give her a dry one. As you caress her with your hands, your words should caress her emotions. Bring back sweet memories. Tell her how beautiful her body is. It's not enough to speak sweet words during sex, you must begin in the morning to create the atmosphere you want in the bedroom at night. You can't shout at and insult her during the day and expect her to open up to you at night. Your words much equal your actions. 

Now you are in a haste right? A woman's intimate part secrets naturally when she is aroused. As you play with her clitoris, you will feel it; you will know when she is ready to have you. Some women don't get aroused when you touch their breasts; you must discover your wife's G-Spot. Don't assume she enjoys it the way your ex girlfriends enjoyed it. She is unique. 

Without adequate lubrication, a woman gets bruised and feels used.  Be tender and patient until she is fully aroused for sexual intimacy.  Instead of using saliva and oil in her vagina, you can purchase lubricants from your local drugstores, it's very cheap. 

Begin by helping out in the kitchen, help her with the bathroom and laundry (if you can't afford a domestic help). Appreciate her efforts and compliment her looks. Send her lovely messages even when you're not around and buy her gifts that will remind her of you. It must not be a very expensive one. When you get to the innermost part of a woman's heart, money means little or nothing. The problem is that a good number of African men are backward when it comes to being romantic and so the only comfort their women have is money. 

The more a lady thinks about you, the more she desires to be sexually intimate with you. You must keep that fire burning. Never stop dating your wife. Your marriage begins to grow old the very day you stop dating her. 

She is not perfect and so you must always forgive her. Don't remind her of her inadequacies. Never make a woman feel unimportant. Don't compare her with your friend's wife. There are things your friend admire in your wife. Do not let the sun go down on your anger with her. Make sure things get resolved before you go to sleep.

When it comes to sexual intimacy, your cellphone and business can wait for this pleasure. Nothing makes a woman feel used and abused like her husband putting her on hold for his cell phone. Before GSM came, people did businesses and family relationships were stronger. Your mother's call can wait and you can call your business partners later. Respect your wife's body and emotions by turning off that cellphone. 

Another thing that makes a woman not to enjoy sex is the consciousness that her body isn't what it should be  (thanks to Hollywood fake bodies). And I always remind women that at the point of sex, the man cares less about the stretch marks, big tummy, and cellulite. But the man should help her with this. Let her know that her breasts are too beautiful that you can't have enough of them and that you will always choose her over anyone else. Assure her that her body is what you want. 

Beautiful wife, sex is not for procreation alone.  If your husband lies  beside you at night and his penis does not make some moves, your marriage is dead. You should be desired by him at all times. Even if you don't want sex, there are other ways to sort him out (if you get what I mean).

He's your husband and you are his beautiful wife. He is bound to you and you alone. He will not always arouse you as much as you desire. You must accept this as part of nature. We have been deceived by the media and Hollywood into believing that sex must be perfect at a times. Nothing and no one is perfect in this world. 

Couples who enjoy good sex life are first of all, friends. Build friendship. When your spouse becomes your friend, you can tell him anything without the fear of being judged or rejected. Tell your husband what you enjoy and what you dont. Feel free, he's all yours. Sir, her telling you how she wants it doesn't make her a prostitute. She is telling you because she loves you and wants to have her best times with you, not with anyone else. 

Don't be too careful to have sex that you end up becoming too rigid for your husband. Try different positions and spend quality time exploring and discovering new erotic spots in and on each other's body. 

Sex is a divine blessing for communion and communication between couples. You cannot enjoy quality sex if you are not comfortable and relaxed. Make up your mind to give your body and time to each other for a fulfilling sexual experience. 

Sex is not hard work;  it is one of the most beautiful and sweetest gifts of life. Stop the 'I have headache' excuses and make it beautiful. If you are not too happy with your body, work on yourself and be fit. If you want to be cuddled, keep your hair clean. If you want you body to be caressed, make it velvety smooth and free of those masculine hair.

I pray you make amends and spend quality time with your spouse. The economy is bad; I know, but it shouldn't affect your private sector. 


Designed by Tunde Sanusi (Tuham)