Thursday, March 3, 2016

Should I be Worried?

Hello Aunty Amara, good day and God bless you for the wisdom and knowledge you are always sharing with us. I admire you a lot. I have never been compelled to write to you before but I have an issue that is bothering me and I would love your constructive advice.
I am a single young lady in the pharmaceutical profession who tries to mind my business and comport myself accordingly. My issue is this , last year I met a man of God who officiated my girlfriend's wedding. I usually escorted her to the church for enquiries during the wedding preparations. Fast forward to after the wedding ceremony, he started calling me severally on a daily basis to check up on me which surprised me but politely responded without giving away my thoughts ... Next , he started calling me severally at odd hours of the night which I find really weird. The first day I picked up I thought something terrible happened and when he told me he just wanted to hear my voice and make sure am ohk by 2am , I was speechless and I asked him where his wife was because it was absurd to me, I ended the call curtly and I never picked up his midnight calls again. (He is married with children).
He developed keen interest in every aspect of my life especially my relationship so according to him , he can be a good mentor and pleaded with me to make him my best friend and confidant and vice versa which I found really uncomfortable and told him clearly that I can't do that and I expected that should be the position of his wife. I don't fear him to speak out my mind but I make sure am polite. .. He comes to my office uninvited at any time and I had to cut that off.
I was shocked when I saw him in my house and he refused to let me know how he got my address. My facial expression told him I wasn't happy and comfortable about it . You may ask how he got my number and it's through my girlfriend who called him with my line at one time and he saved it and since then I don't rest .... He has invited me out to lunch severally and I politely declined and he gets offended when I refer to him as "Sir". He chats me up often on WhatsApp and I usually don't know how to reply because this was supposed to be a man of God. I even refused to accept his friend request on Facebook .
Aunty, I appreciate being checked up on and all that but I have this feeling that it is inappropriate .... What bugged me was that he called me "baby" on WhatsApp and when I commented on that , he said its a normal word he uses for every woman he cares about. .. I feel very uneasy and avoid his calls these days. Am the kind of lady that can't visit my girlfriend's home if her hubby is home alone even if we are all close and I don't accommodate any married man making passes at me, be it a friend's hubby or otherwise. I know when to draw the line to avoid "had I known" but this is a Reverend so I don't know how to interpret it . I don't worship pastors at all.
So Aunty ,do you think I have any reasons to be worried? .. Oftentimes, my friends say am naive when men are making passes at me so I have to be sure this time .. Am I getting worked up over nothing and how do I handle it without being disrespectful to him or his office.

The man of God is first a man with penis and blood before becoming a man who preaches the gospel. It's rather unfortunate that he decided to give in to the temptation of luring you into his love nest but thank God who has revealed that to you. 
Forget about what your friends were saying, there is a huge difference between when a man is making a pass at you and when a married pastor is making a pass at you. The later is evil and deceptive and you shouldn't yield yourself to him. 
Buy airtime, call him and appreciate him for his love,concerns and appreciation of your personality, then let him know that because you are the daughter of the most high God, because you know that the purpose of the devil is to steal kill and destroy, because you know that the devil may use any means to destroy a man and because you know that he's a man of God and you have great respect for a man of God, that you will never have anything whatsoever to do with him, whether by means of mentorship or mutual communication or friendship with him and for this reason, you will be blocking every avenues to communicate with him and will never have anything else to do with him. 
Pray for him and wish him well after which you will delete his contacts and block him from reaching out to you using any medium. It is evil and devilish and if you don't manage this issue with the brutality and honesty that it deserves, he may one day have sex with you and blame you for seducing him or perhaps tag you as a lady with a seducing spirit. 
Don't give the devil any space for exploitation because he will use it to destroy your destiny and render you useless. 
You have no business with his mentorship programme or his interest in your personality, he's married and he should mentor his wife and not innocent ladies. 


  1. Mentors should be of the same sex with their "mentees". Let his wife or other mature women mentor you.

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  3. This isn't a man of God, but an instrument in the hand of the devil. Haven known his intentions, I advice u not to be courteous to him again.He doesn't deserve it.Threaten him that if he doesn't cease his activities, u will report him to his wife.

  4. I don't know how you have respect for such a character. The guy is mischievous and a cheat. He knows what he is doing and wants to accomplish it diplomatically. Do as Lady Amara Van-Lare said. I must add that you have to also call his wife and put her in the know. However,I must add that you're a good lady. Cheers!


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