Sunday, May 29, 2016

Not Comfortable Giving him my Password!

Good afternoon ma'am, how are you doing? I'm really sorry for your loss, please accept my unalloyed sympathy.
I have a problem with a guy I'm going out with. Although he has declared his intention of getting married to me soonest but all of a sudden, he started requesting for my Facebook password. I insisted that it's my private life and so won't give it to him. Up till now, he's still insisting I give the password to him ( he said he's ready to give me his anytime any day).
Even though I have nothing to hide, I still don't feel comfortable giving him my Facebook password because my mind keep telling me that I'm about accepting the proposal of someone that do not even trust me. Please ma'am, what's your take on this?


Whatever that both of you do in your relationship and marriage should be out selfless devotion and mutual love and respect for each other and not out of compulsion and oppression.
Password maybe harmless and social media account may have little or nothing to do with the success of your relationship but for him to constantly threaten you by demanding for your password suggests that he's insecure, and doesn't regard your emotions, or believe that you are honest and sincere to him.
I feel that you should sit down with him and find out what has pushed him into feeling that your relationship and the success of your relationship is dependent on your password. Find out what he's not comfortable with and why he's bent on knowing your password, and decide whether it's worth the stress. There are so many things to deal with than to struggle with a virtual password that has little or nothing to add to your relationship.
If he's not comfortable with your circle of friendship and he doesn't trust you for who you are and what you say or do, it's advisable for him to move on with his life than to put you under perpetual torture and emotional pains as a result of his worries and insecurities.
I must also add that in a relationship with a partner that you desire to spend the rest of your life with, there shouldn't be any privacy policy or terms and conditions or any secrecy or security in any aspect of your life, be it social media, financial and emotional aspects of your life. Of course everyone must respect the personality and perception of each other without much struggles but in a relationship or marriage where there's so much privacy, there'll always be so much suspicion, fear and trust issues. 
So to avoid issues and challenges like that, you must endeavour to balance things and learn to be as naked and genuine as you can so that there won't be anything that will be attributed to you by anyone. 

2 comments:

  1. have you given him a reason not to trust you? It's takes a really emotional strength to see through some things you ladies do as harmless flirting or chats as a man, I have been there, I know how it feels when given a reason not to trust some even though you really love that person and hurts more when the guy is faithful. remember when trust is broken it is rarely repaired, talk to him, massage his feeling and if you have nothing to hide and you love him then give him but explain to him that's it's cos of love for him, I personally have learnt to look over certain things because snooping and trying to know what's going in on has broken my relationship with a girl I really loved and still trying to win back. best of luck

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  2. He is not ur husband yet oooo. Tread with caution

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