Sunday, May 15, 2016

Should I Wait for my Destiny Helper?

Good day ma, please ma advice me am confused. Am a lady of 28 years and am in love with my helper of destiny whom I don't even know for five years and some months now. Sounds funny. A friend gave me a prayer point to tell God to locate the helper of my destiny anywhere he or she is, when all hope has lost in my life and I don't have anyone to run to.
God really answered my prayer, within a week one guy from my place that I did not know that travelled out called me that a friend of him saw my pictures and was demanding for my number and he has already given him my number. That's how how I came in contact with this helper of my destiny.
The first day he called me, he asked me if I was engaged or in any serious relationship, if I was not, I should do away with anything I have to do with any boy from April to August.
Since that April 2011 till now, he has been there for me without minding that he doesn't know nor has seen me before apart from picture. To be honest with you ma, he is my ideal man, always there for me, giving listening ears to my problems and other things, so caring and very principled person .
In 2013, we had a very big quarrel, he lost his brother over there and he came back home and I did not attend the burial because I was writing exam and I didn't know his house nor had means of reaching him. Before I could come back home after my exams, he has gone back to his base, and he stopped picking my calls and he doesn't chat with me again, or if he pick my calls he'll answer it so casual and less concerned.
We later reconciled but things changed, he doesn't confide in me and he doesn't tell me anything about him again. For seven good months he did not call me, I was the one doing the calling and he was someone who doesn't allow me to spend my money on calling him and can't stay a week without calling me all to two times.
He called me one day and was begging me that he was very sorry for treating me the way he did, that he doesn't want me to love him because of what am getting from him that he wanted natural love and I have prove it to him, that he has gone through a lot in the hands of girls to the extent of financing his ex wedding with another man without knowing, that he was going to surprise me by putting a smile on my face soon if I will be patient with him.
Ma he now see me as a small girl that is desperate to get married anytime I raise marriage issue, he sees me as a girl of 24-25 years cos of my slim stature. Ma, my parents are now on my neck forcing me to settle down cos of the way suitors are coming for me, I have told him and he said that if it is what will make me happy, that he wishes me well, and God forbid that I did such thing to him, I can't be that ungrateful after everything he has done for me.
Am very very confused now because he has the resources to come back home, his papers are complete, only that he has a lot of people that is on his pay roll and he is from extended family as he used to tell, and his work has not granted him the kind of leave that he want. Please what should I do, because age is not on my side again.

According to your mail, he told you from the beginning his intentions and you accepted to date him. He has invested heavily in you and he did that because he loves you and wish to settle down with you. 
His wealth made him the ideal personality and made you forget that there's every likelihood that there's another lady in his residence that might have helped him to establish himself.
His wealth also made you forget that you needed to make necessary enquiries about his personality and family. His wealth made you to forget that marriage is not about what a man can provide but who the man is apart from his wealth. 
You accepted his terms and conditions and decided to go for a man you cannot identify nor recognise if he's standing by your side. 
I understand that love can happen anywhere using any means but please strive to bring this floating ship to the ground so that you can at least have a touch of reality in your relationship. 
No matter how busy he might be, work out ways of meeting with him so that both of you can sit down and discuss about the relationship and talk about the future of your relationship. 
All I could read from your mail was that he's a generous man who has so much to share with you, but painfully that's not enough to make him an ideal man nor does it mean that you should rush him and get married to him. 
I feel that you should look well, please be calm and prayerfully make your enquiries about his personality, his personal relationship with God, his family and any other relationship he may have had in the past. 
Know the man you are talking to and find out who he is beyond what he has so that you don't rope yourself into a miserable marriage in the future. 
As for the suitors hanging around you, please follow up with the current relationship and bring it to a logical end before considering any other relationship.


  1. Lolz @ 'destiny helper'.
    What if he is married to another woman or he is crippled or blind.
    How on earth did a guy have never seen become ur 'ideal man'.
    Is this poverty or what?
    #sorry I am rude with the truth

  2. Why I like reading your write ups is because I learn new things from each advice. Thank you my genus

  3. Why I like reading your write ups is because I learn new things from each advice. Thank you my genus


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