Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Should I Call or Leave Her?

Aunty Amara I have been in a relationship almost two years now with a pretty girl. We fixed our introduction for October . Am 33 and she is 24. I spent a lot on her because I loved her. I sponsored her during her law school. I had made sure that she does not lack anything.
She introduced me to her parents last year. She has visited me more than three times this year at Lagos. The problem started last month when I asked her to come to Lagos. She demanded that she must used flight to come but I said NO.
Because her friend used flight to travel to Senegal last two months. I told her things are very hard. I told her to be a good good wife to be, we should manage if their is no money.
She told me that am not her type and she can't be with somebody that is not her type. This is the girl I brought up from dust. This is the girl I sacrificed so much just to make her happy.
Her mummy is owing me N800,000. I need advise on what to do. I stopped calling her since two weeks now and she has never called. Please advise me on what to do. Should I leave her or should I call her?

I will suggest that you call her, find out how she's doing and find out ways both of you can meet and discuss about your relationship. I know that you have sacrificed so much and it will be so painful for you to move on just like that which is why I suggest that you at least hear her out before deciding on what's best for you. 
From the attitude of your partner, it's obvious that she's not in your life to help you become a better man. She's not as beautiful inside as she looks outside and though you may have deep affection for her, getting married to her might not give you the peace and the fulfilment that you crave for.
She seems to be the kind of lady that will not appreciate your sacrifices, encourage you to save, help you to grow, assist you in times of need and celebrate you even when you don't have so much on you. 
Any lady who compares you with another man definitely won't appreciate your efforts and will never be contented with whatever you provide for her. 
I am not in anyway discouraging you but I'm only giving you these pointers to guide you in making your decision. 
Though it's awesome to marry a pretty lady who went to school and is a lawyer but you will enjoy your marriage if you marry your best friend whether educated or not. You will find happiness and fulfilment in life if you marry a lady who contented, industrious, and supportive. You will enjoy your days if you marry a lady who has a personal relationship with God and understands the responsibilities and the challenges that comes with marriage.
Find out from her and then have a heart to heart discussion with her before deciding whether to terminate the relationship or to make amends and continue with the relationship. 
I will also encourage you not to mention all that you did for her and her family, not that they're bad but because they're seeds of faith laced with a heart of love. Leave everything to God and allow him to reward you with a wife that will give you joy and peace of mind.


  1. Nne M,
    I am in love with your word of advice. well done sis

  2. Bros Nigeria appreciates your effort towards free education.
    Please did you sign a marriage agreement b4 u started your sponsorship venture.
    Biko marriage should not be seen as a reward for hard labor

  3. Don't call her and please, terminate that relationship, she is not into you. Forget about picking her from the dust? The good Lord that provided for the money you used to train her, will provide. She is not a wifely material, she is a spender that will not contribute to your betterment in life. Good luck

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