Thursday, June 30, 2016

Want to File for Divorce.

Good morning ma. Please ma, I really need counsel from you cos I can see how you help people with issues and I just thought I can share my troubles with you.
I got married in 2012 at the age of 29 years while hubby was 39. We didn't date, he is the only son. After I got married, I moved in with my hubby in their family house not knowing what marriage has for me. I thought he had a permanent job, but no he was handling a very little contract that didn't last up to four months.
Ever since then, things have been falling apart in my life because all the money I saved during NYSC and the ones I had, plus the N600,000 which my father gave to me have vanished because of marital issues. I've been the one supporting the family since we got married with the little salary I earn. I have never enjoyed a bit in my marriage. Is always regrets and tears flowing down my eyes.
I lost my six months pregnacy recently due to all these issues. It took me a long time before I even conceived. Anything hubby puts his hands into doesn't work out well. He is educated and intelligent. Heard he was very okay before but suddenly things came crashing down on him. He has gone for several interviews and after everything they will tell him that he made it and promise to get back to him. Is always a waisted effort cos they never keep to their promises.
Now we have been asked by our landlord to quit his apartment by this weekend cos there's no money to pay the rent and I can't go to my parents cos of the hard economy.
I have reached out to three men of God for prayers and they always tell me that my husband's problem is from their compound. That someone tied him down in a white garment church so that he won't grow more than him. This has made him to become a huge debtor. I had to pay up some of the debt he is owing.
Am fed up cos right now we don't even know where to pack our properties. I want to file for a divorce cos I don't think I can't cope with the challenges am facing. And age is nobody's friend.
Thank you for reading this and helping me out. God bless you and your family.


I know that you are experiencing so much difficulties and hardship in your marriage but one thing I know is that no matter how hard things might be, it can never overcome a mind that is made up, convinced and focused on making a difference irrespective of the challenges.
Marriage is a journey with many trials, tests, twist and turns and no matter how much you wish to enjoy your marriage, you will have to deal with some of them and device means or ways to conquer them and enjoy the beauty of your marriage.
Every married couple can relate to something that was challenging, difficult, unbearable, unbelievable and sometimes frustrating and almost life threatening but they didn't choose the easy way out but they braced up to the test and gave their all to.
I had to start this way to remind you that someone somewhere have been in your shoes and they overcame and I feel that you can succeed too if you and your husband can put heads together and fashion out ways to solve your problems and strengthen your marriage.
If moving back to his village temporarily will help both of you to strategize and reorganise yourself, please both of you can return back so that you can reduce the financial burden on yourself.
I personally disagree with what the men of God said about your husband, not that I don't believe that the heart of man is wicked but the greatest form of wickedness is one that is inflicted by self known as laziness.
We all know that there are limited offers, we also know that there's great competition for the limited offers, and we do know that economy may not be favourable for some entrepreneurial activities.
In spite of all these obvious challenges, if a man decides to start up something, no matter how little, he will definitely never remain the same. Devil has no hold on a hardworking man because his mind is productive, his hands is blessed with products and his products will be favoured by God.
When a man converts his ideas to products, money will always respond to his demands and needs. But when he sits down complaining, eating and drinking away his life and then praying for something different to happen, the devil will rent a house in his head and destroy his future.
Your husband should wake up and start up something so that your own earnings will compliment his own efforts. It is better to ask for a grant to start up something while he hopes that he will be employed someday than for him to fold his hands and deposit sperm in your vagina and then leave you to starve for the rest of your life.
On your part, you can save up some money and think of businesses that you can venture into. I know that divorcing him will set you free from taking the responsibilities of your husband and his family but what about your growing baby? What will you do when your baby arrives?
If you and your husband can agree to work together with one another, I believe that God will change the circumstances in your marriage and give you your own house.
I am so sorry for the loss of your baby and I pray that you shall not cast your young in Jesus name Amen.
I feel that your marriage can overcome this turbulent times and circumstances and I believe that both of you can work together and raise the funds that you need to meet your needs.

4 comments:

  1. Divorcing him when u should stand by him doesn't speak well of you. Get on ur knees and pray for ur husband

    ReplyDelete
  2. Noted a lot of points for a great change and challenges... Amara May the lord always bless you with more wisdom and grace In Jesus Names Amen....

    My sister,don't ever think of quitting your marriage within a short less time all your problem with be history and you couple will rejoice.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Noted a lot of points for a great change and challenges... Amara May the lord always bless you with more wisdom and grace In Jesus Names Amen....
    My sister,don't ever think of quitting your marriage within a shortest time all your problem with be history and you couple will rejoice.

    ReplyDelete
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