I need your help aunty, right now I feel rejected and disappointed by someone I loved and trusted so much. I met this guy five year ago, though he didn't have all I wanted in a man but I loved him and was ready to be with him.
At first he was caring,supportive, and was always there for me. He is a very jealous guy and each time he called me and I don't answer or I was on call, it will be a different issue that I have to beg him each time to forgive me. Sometimes when am on call and his call enters, I have to hang up whosoever am talking to just to please him but it was not enough for him. I loved him and I showed him love in anywhere I could.
Just few months ago after we met and he went back to where he's staying, things changed. He no longer call the way he used to and when I asked what the problem was, he said nothing. This kept happening till the day I went on his profile, I saw the pictures and comments of a lady he posted. When I asked him about her, he changed entirely. He won't pick my calls anymore or even call me, I was now the one calling, texting and begging him not to leave me and to come back to me but the truth is that he doesn't want me anymore, because I have tried all I could to win him back yet nothing is working.
Am tired of begging and decided to let him go since he no longer wants me. I have tried all I could to let him be, I have stop calling, and texting him but the truth is that deep inside my heart I still love him and want him back.
It's been months now and am still passing through so much pains and tired of crying each day just because of him and I want it to stop. I want this pain am feeling to go away, I want to be happy and not think and cry again but I don't know how to it.
Please I need your advice.
It's normal to appreciate what is good and lovely. It's not a crime to love an individual but what is a crime to self is to lose your self worth, esteem, identity and value because of an individual who doesn't appreciate you the way God made you.
Relationship is a joint investment between two mature individuals who share the same convictions of love, mutual respect and trust for each other, and have genuine purpose for the relationship.
The moment when one partner becomes the sole operator or the only person who now invests to make the relationship work, it's no longer a healthy relationship but a struggle or a plea for acceptance and appreciation.
I know that you are in love with him, painfully he's not in love with you and you cannot purse a man who doesn't share the same convictions you.
You don't beg to be loved and the moment you feel that you cannot live without him, it's pretty obvious that you have lost your self esteem and value.
You need to accept the realities of his decision and move on with your life. That a man doesn't appreciate you doesn't mean that you should reduce your value or live as though there's no man who can love you as you are.
Not everyone who admires a product desires the product, and not everyone who desires the product has the means to acquire the product, but it is only those who acquired the product that truly deserve the product.
This principle applies in relationship and in all spheres of human endeavours. He may have admired you but the truth is that he doesn't deserve to be with you because he doesn't have the qualities that you need in the man that you hope to spend the rest of your life with.
Deciding to remain on the same spot will do you more harm than good and I will encourage you to look up to God and allow him to perfect that which he has already promised in your life.
My love I feel your pain cos I have been in such situations myself time and again but sweetheart let me tell you the honest truth just like AVL has told you already, you don't beg to be love, I know you have had your moment with him but since he no longer want you in his life, my love try as hard as it may seem to put him in the history book and move on, I wouldn't even call that a relationship in the first place where you don't have your space to relate with the opposite sex not that you were doing anything wrong. I was in similar situation last year, there was nothing I didn't do to things work out between both of us, I gave her the best of me when it comes to issue with relationship but just like your story, all of a sudden she change and starting treating me as if I meant nothing to her, my dear I pleaded to know what the problem was because I loved her too deeply to ever think of hurting her, but she keep saying that there was nothing wrong but she don't take my calls nor visit me anymore, I pleaded and waited patiently for over six months just to see if things will improve but it didn't, along the line she started acting as if she was willing again after six months and the last stab on my chest I got was when I had to mark her birthday for her last year, I celebrated it for her in a very big way just to make her happy and I decided to take advantage of the birthday to propose to her cos I wanted to get married to her in few months time, my dear after all the celebration and cutting of cake, I knelt before her and brought out the ring and immediately she stood me up that I should still wait, that she isn't ready, I cried after she left but summoned courage and went to my pastor and the only word that my pastor said that restore my peace was that marriage is a journey and if the other person is not ready to board the same vehicle with you to same destination you can't force them. That was how I had to let go. So my dear I understand you but I want to get your thoughts busy with other things and convince yourself that you are through with that relationship and off course with the Holy Spirit strengthening you from the inside, you will see yourself moving on and getting stronger.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you my dear
Inspiring story you've got there. Marriage is indeed a journey of two
DeleteGone through this same phase too....the pain was just unbearable...but look at me today, much much better than I was
ReplyDeleteMy dear just move on with your life,this life is beautiful for a better tomorrow.THE Lord HIS your STRENGTH
ReplyDelete