Monday, August 1, 2016

Does My Fiancé Still Love Me?

Good day ma. Thanks for you letting yourself to be an instrument of use by God. May your strength never fail.
Please ma, am just confused and tired cos am not sure if my fiancé still loves me and I need your advice and that of your fans out there. My story is a bit lengthy but please ma bear with me.
Am in a distance relationship of two years and four months now. The guy has a good job, God fearing, hard working and he's the type one would pray to have as a husband. We see like once in four months or thereabout.
He has introduced me to some of his family and some friends and promised to introduce me to his sister last Easter but he didn't and has stopped talking about it, and anytime I raise the issue, he changes topic.
I have my past and I opened up to him even how I had aborted for a guy when I was in school cos I didn't want to hide anything from him, even sometimes if I want to do anything, I always call to inform him of my plans and to seek his opinion.
After my last visit to him, he just changed complaining that am affecting his walk with God, that the way am coming to his place is portraying me as a fool and an unwise person, that what if he impregnates me and all the stuffs...
I was just surprised cos when I last visited him, his two younger brothers were there and they have always been with him even on my previous visits and we were all in one room so I just can't imagine why he spoke like that.
We have never ever kissed before nor had any touching whatsoever and we already told ourselves we will wait till our wedding night.
He's also planning of going abroad for a surgery cos he has some problems with his sexual organ and has made him not to think of marriage before but I encouraged him to go for the surgery trusting God for it to be successful after.
These days, his calls have reduced, no more affection, nothing like even saying I love you even on phones cos it will also affect his walk with God. He's threatened sometimes ago to leave cos he said am not a good Christian cos of my visits to him but he was only looking at the fact that am always encouraging him when he's down and because am a Christian.
Am 25 and a graduate teaching in a private school, and he is almost 30, has a car and about to start his house project.
Am I not a fool for always opening up to him? Do you think he loves me? Should I just let him go

If you ask me what I feel, I feel that you are in love with a man who pities you and only gives you the impression that he loves you but the truth is that he's not emotionally available for the kind of relationship you desire from him.
Opening up to him about your past wasn't the issue but I feel that you are dealing with an individual who uses 'a walk with God' to deceive you from the obvious which is that he doesn't share the same convictions about relationship with you.
To help yourself, I will suggest that you stop visiting or calling him. You should consider getting closer to God and building your faith in him so that you don't expose yourself to the abuse and manipulations of your friend.
Let him think of visiting you, that is if he really cares, let him do the calling when he's lead by the Holy spirit, let him give his heart to the relationship and also encourage you in your Christian faith, because I'm certain that you need all those from him.
Get hold of your emotions and start equipping yourself with all the virtues and skills that you need to become a better lady and a virtuous wife to your husband.
You need a man who is emotionally available for a relationship, a man who is proud to be with you and pampers you with all the care and love, and not one who sees you as an option and a liability to him.


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