Am 23, am having suitors, but I have this my friend, we have been friends for six months now, and he wants to marry me, but am a bit scared of marriage, not because am not prepared, but because of what I can't explain(maybe my husband waking up one morning and not being the same man I got married to).
So this my friend is a pastor from another church, but I have always desired to marry from my own church, but the odd people keep coming my way. So when I visited that my friend (the pastor), I got to notice some things, he is domineering, don't like to go to the kitchen with me, love sex, eat a lot. So I got scared, maybe he will turn out to be a controlling husband. So I gave him a bit distance, though I like him.
Then later on I fell in love with my neighbor that is a Corp member, he is done serving but have not gotten a job yet, he is a year older than me, so he pleaded if I can wait for him to make money so that we could get married, I agreed because, I felt am in love. We had a lot of sex, but I denied the pastor sex sha. He is 37 years, so and am having suitors apart from them, but am a bit confused who to settle with. The pastor is not rich the way I want, but he is comfortable. Please advice me, I need your help,
he wants me to meet the family and start our wedding preparation but am holding him, cos I need to clear my head. Thank you
Let's just tell ourselves the truth, young lady, you're not clearing your head, you are only enjoying the sunshine of your Corp member's penis.
The beauty of it is that you are enjoying the attention of the moment, the challenging thing is whether you will be happy and fulfilled with your decision five or ten years from now.
Perhaps your pastor friend is busy preaching to you and helping you become a better lady and a lady of integrity, but the sweet romance of your neighbour won't let you focus.
If I am to be honest with you, I will encourage not to try marriage with anyone for now, you need some time to grow up and understand what life entails.
I will suggest that you take your time to understand your life and what you really need in life. If you can and if it's possible for you, maybe you should minimise your sexual activities so that you can discern the qualities of your partner and decide whether to wait for him or move on with your life.
Marriage has nothing to do with the place of worship but it has a lot to do with your personal relationship with God. If you are weighing the pocket of your partner before getting married to him, you may end up selling your birth right for pieces of naira note, because there's more to marriage than his account balance.
But I'm really wondering, you don't like his church, he's not rich, and according to you he eats a lot and has a domineering attitude, but this Corp member who is jobless, you have no idea when he will establish himself and where his life is heading to, but you fell in love him in such a manner that both of you have sex every night even without money or purpose.
Embarrassing the pastor by telling us that you denied him of sex is not necessary, it's your choice and you have a right to who should sleep with you.
All I suggest that you do is to help your life because the path you're towing may not be the best path for your destiny, but it sure looks beautiful and lovely at the moment.
......Nne,why won't you be confused? You lack purpose. You seem to have no vision for your life,nor even know what you really want in life,nor what to look for in a man. And,you are even sexually involved with your suitors. Do you really wish yourself well? These seeds you are planting,hope you will be happy with the impending harvest?
ReplyDeleteWhat do you even have to offer a man,nor to make a marriage work? What kind of future are you planning for your children? If you are not planning to suffer in life,retrace your steps,shut down the relationships,and get yourself fixed! #qdDOWNLOADS
......By the way,WHAT ARE YOU WITHOUT MARRIAGE? If you think your value is tied to marriage,you are not ready for marriage. You are a marital risk on this path you are treading. Retrace your steps,rediscovered yourself,discover purpose, discover life,and then.....you can prepare for marriage. Until then,you are just another disaster waiting to happen. Learn your lessons now,and don't let that happen to you! ...Go online and download 'The Myth of Singleness' and 'Die Empty' by Myles Munroe and materials by Joseph Prince.
ReplyDelete****
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let me add to the truth she just said,
ReplyDeleteThe moment that your jobless corp boyfriend heard. Or u joke with him say u get belle la san... Just bid the sweet penis bye bye, cuz am sure that 24yrs old boy himself isn't ready for marriage, so do jeje with the sweet plenty love u are making. Na pikin plenty sex dey born no be plenty money.
Anyway you still young that y the plenty suitors n attension but... Y not be Virtue?