Sunday, May 28, 2017

Should I Call Off the Wedding?

Aunty Amara, God bless your good works for humanity. I really have a problem and I want your advice. I have known this my husband to be for over five years. We've been friends and has been very supportive in all I do.
He has assisted me financially and otherwise because he said he wants to marry me.
In 2016, he went to see my parents and made his intentions known to them. My parents accepted him and was very okay with him.
The problem is that he gets angry easily and harbors things in his mind. He can keep it for days and won't talk to you.
Ma we are to get married traditionally by July. A date has been fixed already. These days his attitude is getting worse and it's bothering me. I'm thinking of calling off the marriage now. Also, there was a guy I had something with when I was in school then. He really liked me but we couldn't move ahead because he's a woman beater and possessive too just that a part of me feels something for him. I really need your advice as to what to do and the right steps to take.

Whatever scare you or border you has a great possibility of ruining your marriage. An individual who finds it difficult to forgive, tolerate, and accommodate your inadequacies as an individual is not someone you should consider for a lifetime commitment. 
Though you didn't share those things that provoke him easily according to you but if you don't feel safe and comfortable going ahead with the marriage, please talk to your parents and suggest that the wedding be postponed until you feel comfortable and safe enough for the marriage. 
There is no need for you to consider the second man especially when you know that your feelings cannot protect you from his violent tendencies or emotional abuse. 
What I think you need at this point is some time to reflect and meditate on what you need as a lady, and the man who has fairly those qualities you desire and a man you feel safe with because in all your safety matters most.

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