Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Suicidal Thoughts Creeps in my Mind.

Good afternoon ma. Trust you're good.
I have been in a relationship with this guy for a year now.  He knew I had just completed my OND program and I just got a direct entry form to finish up in the university. We have been good, and things has been moving on very fine. He knew my family background.

I'm not the type that talks about my relationship to my people's hearing till I see a level of commitment, and I always give my all in any relationship I'm in. This guy has two degrees and he's currently doing his housemanship in a hospital.
He started talking about we getting married soon, and of course I was excited. And I believed it was time to tell my parents about it especially mum, and I did.
He started talking with my mum on phone and siblings, and my people welcomed him as part of us. He told his mum about me and of course she asked of my educational background and parents occupations. He told her everything and showed her my picture. She loved my looks and said we should continue praying about it.

I always visited him in the state he's doing his housemanship most weekends and help him do things.

Currently I bought direct entry form to study psychology in the university and he was part of the plan.

Fast-forward last month, I paid him a visit as usual during the weekend. We were together and I suggested we repaint his room and mark it what we achieved for the weekend. I insisted we try the painting ourselves and save that money we would have given a painter. It came out fine.
The weekend was over and I returned to my base the next day being Monday morning. That same Monday evening,  he called that his parents visited. Said we can't get married 😔 and reasons best known to them.
By the way, I am from Ebonyi while he's from Abia state. When I pressed further he opened up and said it's because I'm not a graduate. I saw my world crashing on my head. I sat down and said "just like that?". 

But ofcourse I told him all these then that I am still a student and he said that wasn't what attracted him to me. Why get me this committed and leave me in the middle of nowhere? It's so hard to move on as sucidial thoughts keep creeping in. 

My parents still asks of him as I don't even know what to tell them again. I don't know what to do right now.  I'm in a deep mess and depression is eating deep inside of me.
I will be grateful if you post my story as what way forward. 
PS: I'm 23 years old. Thanks

Will you allow the devil seal your destiny with suicide? God forbid! Will you listen to the voice of the devil that keeps reminding you that without him you will amount to nothing? Will you reduce your value to the perception of another individual? 

At one point in life we were all undergraduates in our journey, so being an undergraduate can/will never be a limitation to anyone who knows her value or virtue in life. 

Since he said that he can't marry you because you are not a graduate, please embrace the divine grace that heals and move on with your life. You don't need see yourself through the lens of men's perception but through the vision of God's promises for your life. 

Focus on your studies and aspire to climb to the highest height in your self and academic development. A man who judges you by your present location have no idea where God is taking you in life, so don't feel bad, simply keep moving forward. You will meet your husband in your journey, hold unto God and be hopeful. 

Inform your parents about the latest development in your relationship, delaying it will only taunt you emotionally. The fact is that he has moved on, and you shouldn't put yourself in a position where you keep hoping things will change while he's happy with someone else. 

Terminate every form of communication with him, and communicate more with God. Stop counting what you feel that you lost, and embrace the best of God. This will surely end in praise. Don't give up on God and in you.

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