Monday, October 16, 2017

How Do I Marry A Lady that Everybody Detests?

Good evening ma, I am a good follower of your page and have been contributing to people's post but I haven't posted before now.
I am in a relationship for about a year plus. I am from Plateau and the lady is from Kaduna. Since the inception of the relationship, non of my family members have supported the relationship, every one kicked against it to the point my sister told me that if I insisted in marrying her, then am saying they shouldn't be coming to my house. Their reason being that all Kaduna ladies in our area are maltreating their husbands and that she won't be an exception.
My mother who lives with me is almost sick because I insisted on marrying her, all my friends too are against the relationship. We both work in the same office.
Last Thursday, my boss sat me down and told me that she is not going to make a good wife for me. My confusion is this:
1. How do I go ahead marrying someone every body don't like?
2. If I am to let the cat out, what reason do you think will be genuine for me to give her so we can part ways and still be in good terms. Thank you. 

Their fears maybe valid but you are the one who will make the decision of who to marry and love for the rest of your life. 
As much as it is wise to consider their fears and listen to their concerns, please do not allow anyone to blackmail you into getting married to a lady you are not in love with or comfortable with. 
Some Kaduna ladies maybe wicked but all Kaduna ladies are not wicked, some Plateau people maybe lovely, but all Plateau people are not lovely. 
We will always meet the blend of good and evil in our society, and we are in the best position to decipher who is good and who is evil. 
You may engage with those who your mother respects, like your pastor or elder or relative, to intervene on your behalf. 
Be patient with her but don't bulge into her request, especially when you haven't seen the traits of evil attributes in your partner. 
Pray and be patient with her, she will gradually get to accept her, and hopefully she will develop some love for her. 
Please if you must marry her, make sure that you have your own accommodation and space, to avoid clashing with your family as a result of your decision. 

Be hopeful, they will support you when you show them how different she is from other Kaduna people.
I didn't respond to the second question because I believe that you can work on the getting your family to accept your decision to marry who you love, however if you wish to please your family over yourself, then the best parting gift is the truth, nothing but the truth.

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