Friday, October 13, 2017

Two Years after Wedding, We're Always Fighting!

Good morning ma, I like what you doing for people, thank you so much. I got married two years ago.
While dating, hubby had a lot of issues. His parents said they won't attend our wedding because our churches are different. Hubby had temper issues and attitude issues, he is a divorcee with a son, he lost his job and has low sperm count. I decided to stay with him thinking we would weather the storm together.
Two years down the line, we are always fighting. I am tired. We fight over everything. He keeps saying I don't have respect. I've searched and searched but don't always know where I got it wrong. Though sometimes I admit I'm wrong.
Silent treatment and malice is hubby's habit. We were both jobless though he has a business. He assured me that we wouldn't lack as he had fixed money in the bank for our startup.
Whenever we had issues, he seizes the car key, disconnects the generator etc. So I will suffer. We plan to open a shop for me since, recently he sold our car and bus, though I was aware as we agreed to it but didn't open any business for me.
Meanwhile we have been having issues for three weeks, he's been keeping malice with me. I asked him why he treats me that way, and why he's stingy towards me, he said he's not stingy, he doesn't just want to be used.
For the first time, I insulted him, I packed a few of my things and left. I am jobless and don't have money, I am frustrated. He never loved me, he fights with me over little things. I'm not his priority, he doesn't encourage me, I'm tired.
He has told me he would go far from me as I'm the cause of this problem, since he met me things have become difficult, said he would sue me and get a divorce.
Please is there any word of advice for me?

Sure there is a word of advice for you. 
You decided to stay with him because you felt that things would work out well for both of you. 
Now that you have invested two years with him and things are not working as expected, you may need to reconsider your decision and decide what you feel is best for you. 
To start with, he sees you as a leach or parasite in his life, and being married to him doesn't make him see you differently. 
Secondly, your being dependent on him have exposed you to unnecessary insults. 
So the first thing you must do is to get something doing. A job, a business, a skill or any other legitimate work/business that will fetch some money for you. 
The second thing is to decide whether this is exactly what you want for yourself. You are in the best position to tell whether you can cope with him or not, and your decision is in your best interest.

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