Monday, November 20, 2017

How Long will I Wallow in Loneliness?

Good evening aunty AMARA, I've been following you for some times now, and I must testify how lucky I am to find myself in a forum like this where I can freely share my pain, thank you for this great job.
With due respect, I am writing to you based on my relationship life. Ma, am a lady of 27 years old, in fact in few months time I'll be 28, and  all my life time I have never experienced what they called a good relationship.
I dated my first guy at age 18 and we dated for two years, though it's a distance relationship because I met him when I was writing my WASSCE, then after which I traveled to hustle for my tertiary education. After we broke up, I met another one in 2012, we dated for a year.
Since then I have not been into any relationship, as pretty as I am, men don't talk to me, at times I think maybe because I don't do much makeupings, but at the same time I ask myself...what of those friends that goes natural and still have toasters and changes men whenever they want to?
I have prayed and fasted, still nothing seems to be changing. Mama, I feel am in another different world. At times I feel maybe because am still in school, but would that really be a barrier? That's a question I always ask myself as I see friends even while in school, they have responsible guys who stood by them in terms of financial support and other things.

I tried hard to take my mind off it, but I just can't do as am not getting younger. Am not a bad girl, " YES" I can proudly say that, a God fearing lady at that, I kept on praying hoping to see the light at the end of the tunnel but nothing seems to be happening as years are rolling by.
When I was in my early 20's, I felt it's my age, now what meaning will I give it as I am in my late 20's already. I have prayed and fasted for God to settle the cry of my heart but.........

The question am trowing to the house now is this....How long will this continue? I am downhearted, don't know what to do again. Mama, please what can be the reason for my predicament? Let me hear your opinion and that of your fans please.
In conclusion...If you have a Christian forum where sons and daughters of God do get hook, I wouldn't mind to join them. Thank you ma.

There is absolutely no nothing wrong with you as an individual, a Christian, and a woman, but maybe you have caged yourself in such a manner that makes it difficult to attract the kind of men that you desire in your life. 
To start with, you don't live your life through the eyes of others, or through the experiences of other ladies. Lady A maybe changing boyfriends but it doesn't in any way mean that she's better than you. Lady B may not be in any relationship but will end up getting married in her very first relationship. So learn never to compare yourself with other ladies, create your own kind of woman and compare your present growth with your future vision. 
Secondly, would you please stop wearing your godliness in your skin and be a woman? Can you learn to be friendly, free, open, honest, firm, responsible, respectful, and purposeful in all your endeavors? 
Some Christian singles live in such a manner that makes them look fake and boring to prospective suitors or friends. They apply too much rigidity that scares some people away from them. No fun time, no flexibility, nothing exciting or real about them, except their greetings and perhaps their physical appearance.
You see, your relationship with God is what defines your conviction, not necessarily what your church compels you to do, or how you try to impress the world with your outward appearance.
So think of looking good, wear adorable hair, wear wonderful dresses, and wear good perfumes. Put yourself in the spotlight by having your own opinion and participating in things that will make you communicate with others and at the same time put your conviction to test. 
Isolating yourself from others is one of the reasons why many good people never get married on time. 
The Bible says that if a light is hidden under the bushel, it's lost it's significance. Be a Christian and still be beautiful, gorgeous, hot, and smart. Be a godly lady and still be a happy and trendy lady. 
That you are gorgeous doesn't mean you will compromise on anything to please any soul. And I am not in any way encouraging you to water down your values to please a man, instead I am saying that you should break away from this cloak of hiding yourself because you are looking for a born again man. 

Attend helpful conferences, summits, seminars, and programs that will enhance your life and add more value to yourself. Your husband will definitely locate you in no distant future. For now, live to the fullness of your purpose and vision as a lady, and allow God to fix your relationship for you. 

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