Monday, February 12, 2018

How Do I Help Him Get Over His Previous Relationship?

Good morning ma, my very good male friend recently summoned up courage to express how he feels about me, and I felt the connection too, but the problem is he is emotionally unstable because of how his past relationship ended, but then he has also made it clear that he is scared to hurt me, and that was why he has kept how he felt about me within himself all these while.
Ma, please how do I go about this in order not be the one pushing first? I mean, after all the years of being friends, I really like him but I need him to put aside his emotional problem (that I know he's trying to do), and prove what he feels for me. I really want to help him but I don't want to look desperate....
And again, I do have some horrible past which I shared with you in my previous post, how do I tell him about them?... Do you think his feeling will still be there for after learning about my past? Please ma, I need guildlines on how to handle this

I have kept my cool all these while because of my past, wasn't thinking or going after any guy, all I have been doing is pray to God for a man that will forgive my past, accept my present and support my future, and then this very good, vibrant and gentleman is asking me out....
I feel I don't deserve him most times, that's why am scared. Ma, please I want to be a blessing to any man I settle down with..
I really need you to enlighten me as you will to a daughter, because am really confused,shy and scared. 

To start with, he's emotionally unstable, and until he's emotionally healed, it will be challenging loving a man who is yet to get over his past or pain. 
Build a healthy friendship, don't commit so much to him or expect so much from him. Help him understand that this will be a gradual process for both of you, and give him the room to express his feeling and his desire for you. 
No matter how much you love an individual, please do not resurrect your past experiences in your relationship/marriage. It is not necessary nor does it have any relevance to your present or future life. 
No need to tell an individual how many men you slept with or how many ladies you have given blow job. 
Build your relationship on core values, not on previous relationships with others. 
Please, do not go into any relationship with low self esteem or value. You are a better woman today because of the experiences you had yesterday. You will definitely make mistakes today to become a better person tomorrow, and any individual who has nothing to look back to and learn, is an individual who is fake, with no value, and has no wisdom to share with others. 
Though you may have some regrettable past, it doesn't in any way mean that you shouldn't expect the best from God or demand the best from life.
Be open to learn, grow, and improve on yourself, but never have low expectation for yourself

1 comment:

  1. My Husband was so smooth at hiding his infidelity and I had no proof for months, I was referred to Private investigator  and decided to give him a try.. the result was incredible because all my cheating husband's text messages, whatsapp, facebook and even phone calls conversations was linked directly to my cellphone. ( Mr James helped me put a round-the-clock monitoring on him and I got concrete evidence and gave it to my lawyer..if your husband is an expert at hiding his cheating adventures contact him


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