Monday, January 9, 2017

I'm Afraid of Getting Married to Her?

Good evening ma, I have this girl, we have been courting for four years with God's direction, but with her attitude and even her words, she makes me know she doesn't love me.
She is sticking by, afraid to love someone else, but with me, no more love,
there is nothing I have not done to make her love me.
It is just not working. It is as though I have been pushing myself in the relationship for more than four years.
I have not been afraid of getting married to her until now that her attitude persists.  Not as though I'm afraid of sticking on,  but I felt since she is God's will,  will it be right to let go of her,  since she will be happy that way.
Just waiting for me to say it to get the blame  What's your advice ma?

You didn't include her age to help me understand what might be going on in her mindset at this point in her life. 
That God told you that a lady or man is yours doesn't mean that you must be the one to prepare her or push her to marriage. It doesn't mean that you should impose yourself or tag along with a lady who is emotionally, mentally, and psychologically not prepared for relationship or marriage. 
There are some individuals that needs some time and patience to evolve and grow into the woman that God desires for their ministry. There are some will of God that needs to be tested by time and the circumstances of life to be certain that they're truly God's will. 
Any time you feel that you are imposing yourself on a lady, that's the very time to withdraw from the relationship. Relationship is meant to be a mutual investment and not a one man show, so if she's not willing to give her heart to the relationship, there is no need imposing yourself on her. 
You need to take a step or two backwards, love yourself more, accept yourself, give her the space and time to decide what she wants. 
Even if she's God's will, allow God to work out his will in her life. Remember that it is God who works in us both to will and to do his good pleasure. Don't do that which God himself ought to do for you, and if after some time there's no positive manifestation in her attitude towards you and the relationship, then you may need to seek the face of God for your own wife. 
God cannot give you a partner who will not accept you in her life, or a partner that will make you feel unloved and unhappy with yourself. 

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