Monday, July 3, 2017

Am I Really A Beast?

Good day ma,  my girlfriend left me to marry last two months. Few days to her marriage to a man she claimed she never loved, she realized that she was pregnant for me. I told her to come back to me and cancel the wedding, but she said the disgrace and stigma will be much for her, I had to give in for her to terminate the pregnancy because the church will run a test on her night before the wedding.
The problem now is that the abortion was unsuccessful which landed her on heavy bleeding that she almost lost her life, and the husband found out cos it was done two days to her wedding. She pleaded till weeks after her wedding, and the hubby sent her out of the house when he realized what she did. That he can't continue with such woman, and she wants me back.
I told her that we have crossed lines, that we both cannot come back cos she is married either separated or living with him. Everyday I hear calls, how she cries all day, trying to harm herself cos both men rejected her. She sees me as a beast, Please ma, am I doing the right thing staying away from her?
Honestly after the abortion, the doctor said she might not conceive again due to the complications she had, but she had a choice of leaving the child at first.
How can I accept a lady who aborted my baby to marry another man? I suddenly became important because things did not go well.

She had options and made her decision. Whatever was the outcome of her decision shouldn't be hung on you as the scape goat. Please refuse/resist every form of emotional blackmail from her in the name of love or friendship. 
If she loved you as much as she claimed, why did she choose to sacrifice your own child at the altar of another man? Why didn't she sacrifice her marriage for you when it was obvious that you got her pregnant? 
If she thought it wise to terminate your baby for her husband, please take your time and make a wise decision about what you want in a lady or what you want in your wife. 
This has absolutely nothing to do with the consequences of her abortion, but your happiness as a man. If she's what you want in your wife; if she has those qualities that you desire in a lady; if you feel that she's the wife you need in your life, then you may reconsider. But if you don't see your wife in her, please let her go and shut off every form of communication with her. 
Don't fall for her cheap blackmail because marriage is not a gamble where anyone wakes up and does anything, then come back to act like you don't have any other choice but to stick with her. 

She made her decision, please feel free make your own decision and follow through with it. 

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