Sunday, July 9, 2017

How Long Will I be Delayed?

Good day ma, I have an issue bordering my heart. Have been with this guy for nine years now. We met in secondary school. We started as friends. He is everything I ever ask God for, he is caring, loving, hardworking, he does farm work to aid his schooling.
A graduate now, but no good job, I have never requested for anything and he said no, he has never shouted, raised his hands on me or quarrel, when am sick, he is there as well. He is sponsoring my education in the university with just ₦30,000 job.
My problem now is, I love him so much too, I can't wait to be married to him. But the delay is too much. My friends are getting married, it hurts because my man is still struggling with a widow mum.
Am not after money, I love him, but I am tired of this delay. I told him about it, he pleaded I should stay with him, how long will I be delayed?  Am hurt ma. 

I'm tempted to say that you are an ingrate and a selfish lady, but I realized that you sought for counseling. 
Where were your friends when you needed someone to support you? What exactly is the problem in your relationship that both of you cannot work on? 
When you needed support, encouragement, assistance, he was there, but just because he doesn't have so much money to marry you, he's suddenly struggling with his widow mum. 
Is your hands broken or is your brain empty? If he could sacrifice everything to sponsor your education, why not think of ways to support him to enable both of you to get married? 
You're being delayed, because you feel that after wedding party, you will vanish from the earth. Please calm down and stop making your partner feel stupid for loving you. 
Since he's into Agriculture, suggest pig farming to him, or any other farming that is economically viable.
Do you know that you can also work and support him? Do you know that you can also save some money and give to him to make your vision a reality? 
This is not the time to nag about being delayed, but the time to work with him and be a blessing to his life. This is the time to prove that you genuinely love him and his widow mum. 
If that man could humble himself and combine farming with his job, he's a responsible man, one you should cherish with your life. Of course, you have benefitted from his sweat, now is the time for you to demonstrate that you genuinely love him. 
Wake up from this stupid thought of being delayed, and work with your partner. In the next twelve months, you will definitely be married to him if you bend down and work with him instead of frustrating him for nothing. 
Your journey and that of your friends are never the same, so quit comparing yourself with them. Focus on improving on yourself, and support your partner in the best way you can. 
You also don't need a huge wedding party, work on saving enough to do the basic and kick off with him. 
The God who elevates the humble will definitely bless your humble beginning, that is if you will humble yourself and work with him.

I'm sorry I sounded harsh, it was intentional. 


  1. One thing that annoy me about ladies of today is that most the ladies claiming my friends are getting married don't even have a dine to contribute to the wedding ceremony. so annoying

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