Sunday, August 19, 2018

I'm Heartbroken and Confused; Help Me!

Dear sister Amara, thanks for doing a great job, please I'll like to seek for your advice. 
There's this guy I dated back in 2013, we loved each other so much but we broke up because he's a military personnel and my parents felt they usually don't have time for their wives, so I got married in 2015 and left the abusive marriage in 2017.
Somehow fate brought us back with the military guy, and I was asking why he hasn't gotten married after our break-up but his excuse was that he hasn't gotten someone befitting to be called a wife.
I told him about my divorce and that I am not ready to date anyone any longer, but he stood by me all through the moment of pains: he placed me on monthly allowance and provided all I needed for my son and I .
Then he brought up the issue of marriage, and I told him to wait because I want to enroll for my Msc . He agreed he was going to wait, he introduced me to people as his fiancé, his colleagues call me madam, he doesn't hide anything from me, he has an Instagram account where he flooded my pictures professing his undying love.
Aunty Amara, what broke my heart now is that he came visiting and left for Ilorin to see his folks, only for a woman to call me over the phone to beg me to please leave her husband alone, she claimed they've been married since 2014 and that he even impregnated another lady in 2015 and married the girl in a low key way. But her husband said he loves me and she can only beg me to please leave him for her. I called him immediately and he started stuttering over the phone begging me to forgive him. 
I am heartbroken and confused, please help me

You don't need to be confused here because his wife has called you to give you the facts about his marital status which he didn't deny but apologized for hiding his marriage from you. 
You now need to decide whether to become his third wife or to terminate the relationship you share with him. 
As you can see, he's living up to the expectations of your parents, and you can decide whether you want to become part of his love triangle or appreciate yourself by moving on with your life. 


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