Friday, October 7, 2016

Don't Know How To Win His Heart.

I met this guy since our JSS3, we became classmates and lovers till our SS1...... I left school after SS1, he left too but to Lagos.... We had issues and didn't talk to each.... He later travelled to UK which I didn't know of.....I later heard and felt bad. This is a guy I don't stay a day without seeing him in my dreams. After my SS3, I tried forgetting him but I couldn't....
So it happened that he came to see me when he came back, we had a nice time and he invited me to his place and tried having sex with me but I refused,
he got upset because I couldn't express myself, and that was the last I heard from him, he didn't speak to me again or even tell me when he travelled back to UK.
I searched him everywhere till I found him on LinkedIn July this year, he was so happy to see me after so many years. He invited me to his place in Lagos, I went and spent sometime with him. The first night I arrived, we drank to celebrate the reunion... We both got drunk and we had sex.
Ma'am a lot of things has changed about him, he has so much grown into a man, he has changed so much, I can't seem to read his mind or understand him anymore.... He's now like a stranger..... After I left his house, he doesn't seem to be excited about me or something.... He doesn't call anymore. Please I really do love him with all my heart and soul, I really want him back to me, but I don't know how to.
He is my first love... I really can't imagine myself without him, he occupies my thought.... I even dreamt when he got me engaged.

I know that you are deeply in love with him and he seems to be the perfect romance that you wished for when you were in high school. You have also made so much efforts to make sure that this relationship works for both of you, but the realities of time and change have taken a toll on your partner.
That school boyfriend that you love so much, that you can't sleep without seeing him in your dreams is now a man with a different kind of ideology, perception, vision, and ambition in life. He no longer loves you as as much as you love him nor does he share the same values that both of you shared in your early days.
You have made so much efforts to let him know that you truly love him and he has already exploited that avenue by feeding you with alcohol and harvesting your vagina.
The truth is that he is acting cold and withdrawn from you because what he was in love with was your body and not your heart or your personality. He doesn't feel connected to you for any reason that is best known to him, and I am afraid to say that you may end up hurting yourself more if you continue in this venture.
If he made any form of commitment to you, you could actually press on that and then work with him but where the is no desire, passion, convictions or vision from his end, you may end up with regrets.
I know that you genuinely love him but I feel that you should give him some space and love yourself a little. If a man desires a lady, he will go all the way to win her heart, but when he doesn't love the lady, no matter what she does to please or satisfy him, he may not make any commitment to the lady.

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